I have nothing against Michael Phelps at all. I got a kick out of watching him swim to 8 gold medals and had even more fun writing about him hooking up with Stephanie Rice to potentially produce a race of superhuman aquapeople. But, I have to be honest here, I think this next piece of news may be a bad move on Phelps's part.

Phelps is scheduled to kick off the season premiere of Saturday Night Live on September 13th. Now, the reason I think this might not be the best of ideas is that, well, have you seen any of his interviews?

I'll let Troy Patterson of Slate explain:


In other words, he's going to suck on Saturday Night Live.

But whatever, I know I'll still be watching. And since Phelps will be on SNL, it gives me a chance to pull up some of the better athlete performances in SNL history.

Like Tom Brady and sexual harassment.



And Peyton Manning beaning kids with a football for United Way.




And while I don't have a clip of it, Joe Montana gave the most immortal athlete line ever in SNL during a skit entitled Sincere Guy Stu where Montana played a roommate of Phil Hartman's who spoke exactly what was on his mind. The clinching line?


Hey, if Phelps says something like that, I'll take back everything bad I said about him.

Phelps to host SNL season premiere [Baltimore Sun] via [Fanhouse]

You'll hear all the clichés today about how teams are just looking at this first game and that's all they care about. Maybe that's the right mindset, but we know it's not possibly true. For us fans though, we can look ahead all we want and that's what we're going to do. 

It always turns out that a few overlooked games define a season (see: Appalachian State), but we can be sure the game of the year is somewhere below.

We'll go a little heavy on the early games as that tends to set the trend. Here's the biggest games on the 2008 season:

August 30th: Utah at Michigan Easily one of the most anticipated games of this opening week. Michigan has undergone a lot of changes, namely a complete change in the style of play. One game won't define the Rich Rodriguez era, but a loss on opening week will make the mountain he has to climb grow a little larger. It's Michigan, so there's plenty of talent, but the big problem is at quarterback. Don't be surprised to see a good Utah team pull off an "upset."

August 30th: Missouri vs Illinois The Tiger were robbed out of an Orange Bowl berth, but the Kansas Jayhawks clearly represented. That said, you know Chase Daniel and Co. are motivated by that snubbing and want to prove they are one of the best teams in the country. The schedule sets up well for BCS berth, but first, it's rival Illinois. Ron Zook's team is a mystery. Rejus Benn is a game-changer, but Juice Williams needs to prove he's developed as a passing threat to beat Mizzou. Statement game for the Big Ten as well.

August 30th: Alabama vs Clemson Two impatient fan bases expect to win this game. Clemson has high expectations yet again, and needs to show the country that this year they are serious about a national title, ACC championship. Although winning early has never been a problem for Tommy Bowden. It's those late games. Nonetheless, this will set the tone for the ACC season with the Tigers as a frontrunner.

August 30th: LSU vs Appalachian State This may not be close, Vegas hasn't even put a line down, but no reason to overlook the defending FBS champ vs the FCS champ. Armanti Edwards returns for the Mounties and they'll have plenty of confidence. Hurricane Gustav could turn this into a more neutral playing field, albeit a messy field.

September 13th: Ohio State at USC Game of the year, for sure. The Buckeyes are improved and the Trojans are possibly improved as well with Mark Sanchez and Joe McKnight. Both teams could probably afford to lose this game, win out and still finish back into the BCS Championship spotlight, but the winnner clearly sits as the leader in the clubhouse. Hard to see Ohio State winning here.

September 13th: Kansas at South Florida Last year's two big surprises try to prove they're going to stick around.

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This video is terrible, and by that, I also mean terribly funny. As you've surely heard by now, Jose Guillen had to be held back from going after a fan on Tuesday night that had been heckling him all night and said "the magic word" according to the Kansas City Royals right fielder.

We assume the attendee in question was a Royals fan because who else would subject themselves to a game in Kansas City. And we also assume he was drunk, because, well, he's a Royals fan.

Who knows what was said, probably something about someone's momma having a higher batting average, but either way it's a good close up angle, albeit shaky, of the mad man that is Jose Guillen.

Seriously, if you're going to taunt someone, try to harass one who isn't crazy enough to actually come into the stands and beat you silly.

In other news, Royals manager Trey Hillman picked a good spot for this show.

“I was actually in the toilet, so I didn’t see it,” Hillman said. “Managers do have to use the restroom and I guess I picked a bad time to be in the restroom. … There’s no sense on commenting on it.”

Raw Video Of Jose Guillen Wanting To Kick KC Ass [Busted Coverage]

Happy College Football Day! Most of your teams aren't playing until Saturday, but tonight we get real actual football on college campuses. I can't be any happier about that.

Before we start making some new highlights, I thought we'd take one last look back on gems of 2007. We can only hope Mike Gundy's rant gets topped. I'd settle for someone even making it into the ballpark.

Michigan falls to Appalachian State in the first game of the season, on Big Ten Network's debut.



The coaching rant to end all coaching rants. Gundy is 41 now, but still a man.



Quite possibly the game of the year. Kentucky 43, LSU 37 3OT



Trick play of the year, mostly due to the look on Steve Spurrier's face.



Upset of the year, volume 2. Jim Harbaugh gets the best of Pete Carroll.



Because beating Notre Dame never gets old. Navy finally wins.



There's plenty more highlights, both those were the images that stood out for me in one of the more entertaining college football seasons in recent memory. The fun starts tonight. Enjoy.